cause i'm feeling lost

when i'm in your arms

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Decoy (1/1)
[glee] quinn cry
Title: Decoy
Author: trustisalie
Rating: PG-13 for drama, violence, and language.
Pairing/Characters: Rachel, Jesse, Quinn, OMC
Disclaimer: I don't own Decoy by Paramore, or anything else but the plot
Spoilers: None, it's AU, though you'll all probably end up hating one or two of these characters in the end, but that's supposed to happen.
A/N: This is really just a oneshot I had lying around for like three years and decided to post/adapt it since I've hit a mini-block in the crossover (which I will remedy in the next two days, swear) and Shiver's just kicking my ass.
Word Count: 1,486
Summary: You feel weak and powerless against him. You have for years. Finally, someone comes along and for a few moments, you don't feel that. But does that change it permanently? No. It never will.

Close your eyes and make believe
this is where you want to be
Forgetting all the memories
Try to forget love cause love's forgotten me

You feel weak and powerless against him.

You keep your gaze down at the floor as you flinch slightly when his hand slaps down on the linoleum. You know better than to make a move now. Your eyes beg to move up, but you know that looking into his eyes is against the rules. And you desperately don’t want to make a mistake, not now.

“You should know by now how things run around here,” he calls out, practically begging you to talk back or look at him. But you can’t. Because the outcome of the night all relies on how you act during the next twenty seconds.


His sudden call makes your eyes fly up and your brown eyes lock on his blue ones for barely a millisecond. But that’s long enough to be mistake number one. Even as you try to make it seem like you didn’t look at him, it’s way too late.

“How many times do I have to run this through your thick fucking skull?” he calls out, slowly walking around the metal and wood island. You close your eyes, wishing for time to rewind long enough for you to not make that stupid, damn mistake.

It’s no use as he towers above you, shadowing you in his silhouette. “Are you a fucking retard or something?” he throws at you while grabbing your slender wrist and pulls you to your feet.

He’s already walking off as soon as your butt leaves the tile, throwing you off balance. A sharp, painful tug on your wrist gets you up on your knees and you clamber to your feet.

All you can think about as you’re pulled into the hallway is her. One girl and about how she shouldn’t have to see you like this.

You’re only focused on him as you’re tugged past the living room, past his drunken roommate and past the hazel-eyed girl that has your thoughts.

The hazel-eyed girl that you’ve gotten far too close to; the one you know better than the boy that’s got a vice-grip on your wrist. That very girl who’s currently watching as you’re dragged into the bedroom.

The door slams shut behind him and you feel yourself being thrown to the ground, almost smashing your head against the wooden chest at the end of the bed.

You slowly get to your hands and knees as you hear him come up behind you. You brace yourself for what was about to come, for you were sure it wasn’t going to be good.

“How many times do I have to tell you?” Jesse exclaims, not caring if he’s heard. “It’s a simple fucking concept, Rachel. A simple, fucking concept!” And before you can say anything, Jesse has a hold of your hair and spins your body in the direction of the thing that set him off.

As you look at the source of Jesse’s anger, you try not to let your shock show. It never ceases to amaze you at what could set him off. The unfolded covers on the bed that you’re gazing at were certainly new though.

Jesse pulls back on your hair so that you’re facing the ceiling. “It’s not that hard to get it right, Rach. It’s really not,” he yells. “What do you have to say for yourself?” You can tell from his tone that his eyes are practically begging you to say something back.

You quickly think of something to say before Jesse loses his temper even more. “I’m sorry. It won’t happen again,” you manage to get out before he’s got your back to the wall and his lips are on yours.

Even though you feel nothing as his cold, rough lips are on yours, you act like you do, simply to spare yourself the pain that would be inevitable if you didn’t. You press back on his lips and shake as his hands crawl up your body.

You feel his lips lift from yours and trail down to your neck. You feel him gently bite down, but not hard enough to leave a mark. He was always careful about that.

But she wasn’t. She wanted the world to know. And leaving her mark on your stomach was just the thing to let them know. You had been so caught up at the moment that you didn’t think about covering it up.

As that thought crosses your mind, you feel him lift up your shirt, and you automatically become nervous. Closing your eyes, you feel him lift the shirt off you and you wait for the impending hit.

The punch to your stomach sends you to the ground, all the air leaving your body. Jesse grabs your hair and forces your head down, making you look at your stomach and the fresh hickey that lays below your belly button.

“Are you fucking cheating on me?” Jesse yells as you feel him slam you into the wall with a kick. Everything goes blurry for a moment after the back of your head bounces off the wall, only to reconnect with it seconds later from a punch to your jaw.

“Fucking whore!” You find yourself on your stomach as Jesse forces you to the floor. He’s got a hand wrapped around your hair and your forehead meets the ground. You flip to your back when he lets go of your hair and grasp your forehead, feeling the world tilt and spin every time your eyes open. You feel him grab your head and once again, you’re slammed into the hard wooden floor beneath you, causing the tilting and spinning to increase.

Just as you feel your head being picked up once again, the door bursts open and rebounds off the wall, hitting the person walking in. You think they should’ve been knocked to the ground from the force of the rebound, but they stand their ground.

“What the hell? Go back out to the living room, Quinn. I’ve got some things to deal with here.” Jesse says as he puts all his weight on your bruising stomach, making it even harder to take a breath. It doesn’t really matter, because as soon as he said her name, all the air you’re gasping for left your body.

Jesse’s so focused on you that he doesn’t notice the chain belt wrap around his throat and successfully cut off his air supply. The blonde tightens her grip on the ends of the belt, enclosing it more, and pulls the blue-eyed boy off of you some.

“Come on, Rachel, get up,” her voice takes on the same soft tone that she always uses with you and you scramble to your feet, stars dancing before your eyes.

You grab your shirt and throw it over your head as Quinn holds the belt tight around his neck. You feel a smile form as you see Jesse clawing at the belt helplessly while glaring at you. It’s a bitter kind of payback, but it works for you just the same.

“God damn asshole,” Quinn exclaims, the anger in her eyes now resounding in her voice. “Fucking prick.” She finally lets go of the belt when Jesse’s eyes flutter closed and walks to you, hands a raw red from the pressure she was putting on holding the belt.

“Come on.” You take her offered hand and walk out of the bedroom on semi-shaky legs, not looking back at the blue-eyed male on the floor who was coming to.

Quinn leads you to the door and doesn’t pause as his roommate calls out to you. Quinn’s fingers entwine with yours as she slams the door shut and all thoughts leave your head except for the feeling of her hand next to yours.

You see your neighbor, Mrs. O’Grady, walking out to her mailbox, but you pay no mind. The two of you are halfway to Quinn’s BMW before you’re slammed back into reality as the front door of the house opens.

You immediately freeze and Quinn turns to you with a hopeful expression on her face. You already know it’s him even before he takes the first step outside of the house.

“Rachel, come back inside,” Jesse’s voice has the calm and steady tone to it that was missing in the last hour. You feel Quinn’s eyes on you as you look to the ground, making a decision.

A tug on your hand makes you pull your head up and you look at her for a moment. The second light tug comes after you glance back at the house. You take a deep breath and make mistake number two.

You drop her hand and spin around, making your way back inside the house, not bothering to look at anything or anyone. You know Quinn’s eyes are glaring at Jesse as he shuts the door and you feel nothing as a sad realization comes to you.

You are weak and powerless against him.

Don't look so blue, my little decoy
You should've seen right through, my little decoy
You've never been so used, my little decoy
As I'm using you, my little decoy

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Gah, this was just devastating. I can hardly stand poor little Rachel getting beat up on like that, but still this was so good.

Sorry about Shiver, bb! I will be sending you all my good muse vibes because I have lots after my vacation.

Thanks hun, glad you liked it, even with the subject matter.

And thanks for that! I'm trying my best to get it done, but it's taking forever.

It just was so well written that I couldn't not like it.

Well, I can understand why. I'm finally realizing how difficult adapting can be since I started working on mine. There are a lot of things to keep straight and then the questions of what to change and what to keep the same. It's rough and I sympathize. *hugs*

Thank you again. And now I'm blushing. :)

Mhmm. You think it's easy, but it's really not. Especially with changing pronouns and appearances and details. It's definitely a hard fought product, though. *hugs*

Oh my gosh, Rachel! I feel so bad for her; I can't believe she went back! It kind of makes sense... but holy freaking shit!

And great writing by the way :D

The only word that seemed a bit off was 'blue-eyed male'. But that could be because I use that word in fantasy stories where the guy characters aren't exactly 'men'...

T____T No Rachel. You are supposed to follow the gorgeous blond.

Heartbreaking and wonderfully written. Then again, I didn't expect anything else coming from you. :D

Good luck with Shiver though. I hope it starts working for ya.

  • 1

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